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.Maybe she didn’t feel the need to argue with her older sibling because she was aware of all her blessings, and didn’t begrudge her sister the illusion of control.After all, it was just an illusion.No one else can really control your life unless you let them.12Though she still looked pale, the next morning Alice said she was feeling well enough to head for Vegas.We arrived that afternoon and I felt like Alice in Wonderland.Anyplace where the predominant decorating theme is rhinestones and neon and nobody thinks twice about seeing Elvis walk by is not the real world.“It’s Disney for grown-ups,” Alice said as I followed her through the lobby of the Venetian Hotel, where we’d splurged and booked a room.Cocoa was tucked into an oversize tote bag slung over my shoulder.I could feel her shifting around in there, but she was being quiet.For all I knew, this fancy place allowed dogs, but I wasn’t taking any chances.The Venetian Hotel was more opulent and definitely cleaner than the real Venice had ever been.From the elaborately frescoed ceiling to the canal winding through the adjacent shopping center and the musicians strolling through the lobby, I felt as if I’d stumbled into an over-the-top Italian restaurant.Just looking at the plastered columns made me hungry for cannoli.Of course, there was more to the hotel than frescoes and canals.Even at registration I could hear the bells and whistles of the casino, which a brochure boasted was 120 thousand square feet, with twenty-five hundred slot machines.“What should we do first?” I asked when we were settled in our room.Cocoa had curled up at the end of my bed and promptly gone to sleep, unimpressed by the grandeur of her surroundings.Alice grinned.“I feel like a drink.Something fancy, with an umbrella and fruit in it.”Ten minutes later, mai tais in hand, we stood in the lobby again, looking around.“Travis and I were married here, did I tell you?” Alice said.“Not in this hotel, of course, but in Vegas.”“No.” I wondered what had prompted her to mention this now.“We wanted a quickie wedding and Vegas seemed the right place.”“A lot different from your Amish honeymoon,” I said, staring up at the elaborate fresco overhead.She nodded.“Vegas was loud and flashy and exciting.We drank and gambled and generally had a good time, but I think what we were really trying to do was run away from our own guilt.”She glanced at me.“I thought I’d succeeded for a while, but it never really left, and it tainted our relationship.”“Because you felt bad about leaving Bobby?”She nodded.“I loved Travis, but it wasn’t enough.Who would have thought guilt would be more powerful than love?”Right.Who would? I took a big drink.“Let’s not think about that now,” I said.“We’re here to have fun.”“Yes, we are.” She was smiling again, even if the expression was a little forced.“Let’s check out the slot machines.”For the next two hours we flitted from one machine to the next, trying our luck.I favored the ones that were more like video games, with bonus rounds and lots of action to keep things interesting even when I wasn’t winning much.Alice was a more serious gambler, lingering at traditional one-line machines, feeding them quarters and yanking down the handle with robotic precision.After a while the allure of the machines faded and we headed for the ticket office to try to score seats to a show that night.We quickly learned we’d waited too late, so we settled for tickets for the next night.We went upstairs to check on Cocoa and sneaked her out a side door to an alley for a potty break.When she was settled once more, I turned to Alice.“What now?” I asked.“Dinner.One thing about Vegas—you can eat cheap.”We ended up at a crowded buffet.Alice’s choice, not mine, but I didn’t bother arguing.When I was overweight, buffets were heaven.Everyone expects you to pile your plate full at a buffet, so I never felt self-conscious about the amount I ate.Just remembering those days was enough to help me keep my portions small now.Alice didn’t take much advantage of the bounty, either.No wonder she was so skinny.I hadn’t seen her eat a complete meal yet.We found a table next to a family with two children—a boy and a girl I guessed were around eight and six.The whole family was dressed in shorts and T-shirts, with wheat-blond hair and blue eyes.They could have stepped right out of a brochure that advertised Vegas as the perfect family vacation destination [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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.Maybe she didn’t feel the need to argue with her older sibling because she was aware of all her blessings, and didn’t begrudge her sister the illusion of control.After all, it was just an illusion.No one else can really control your life unless you let them.12Though she still looked pale, the next morning Alice said she was feeling well enough to head for Vegas.We arrived that afternoon and I felt like Alice in Wonderland.Anyplace where the predominant decorating theme is rhinestones and neon and nobody thinks twice about seeing Elvis walk by is not the real world.“It’s Disney for grown-ups,” Alice said as I followed her through the lobby of the Venetian Hotel, where we’d splurged and booked a room.Cocoa was tucked into an oversize tote bag slung over my shoulder.I could feel her shifting around in there, but she was being quiet.For all I knew, this fancy place allowed dogs, but I wasn’t taking any chances.The Venetian Hotel was more opulent and definitely cleaner than the real Venice had ever been.From the elaborately frescoed ceiling to the canal winding through the adjacent shopping center and the musicians strolling through the lobby, I felt as if I’d stumbled into an over-the-top Italian restaurant.Just looking at the plastered columns made me hungry for cannoli.Of course, there was more to the hotel than frescoes and canals.Even at registration I could hear the bells and whistles of the casino, which a brochure boasted was 120 thousand square feet, with twenty-five hundred slot machines.“What should we do first?” I asked when we were settled in our room.Cocoa had curled up at the end of my bed and promptly gone to sleep, unimpressed by the grandeur of her surroundings.Alice grinned.“I feel like a drink.Something fancy, with an umbrella and fruit in it.”Ten minutes later, mai tais in hand, we stood in the lobby again, looking around.“Travis and I were married here, did I tell you?” Alice said.“Not in this hotel, of course, but in Vegas.”“No.” I wondered what had prompted her to mention this now.“We wanted a quickie wedding and Vegas seemed the right place.”“A lot different from your Amish honeymoon,” I said, staring up at the elaborate fresco overhead.She nodded.“Vegas was loud and flashy and exciting.We drank and gambled and generally had a good time, but I think what we were really trying to do was run away from our own guilt.”She glanced at me.“I thought I’d succeeded for a while, but it never really left, and it tainted our relationship.”“Because you felt bad about leaving Bobby?”She nodded.“I loved Travis, but it wasn’t enough.Who would have thought guilt would be more powerful than love?”Right.Who would? I took a big drink.“Let’s not think about that now,” I said.“We’re here to have fun.”“Yes, we are.” She was smiling again, even if the expression was a little forced.“Let’s check out the slot machines.”For the next two hours we flitted from one machine to the next, trying our luck.I favored the ones that were more like video games, with bonus rounds and lots of action to keep things interesting even when I wasn’t winning much.Alice was a more serious gambler, lingering at traditional one-line machines, feeding them quarters and yanking down the handle with robotic precision.After a while the allure of the machines faded and we headed for the ticket office to try to score seats to a show that night.We quickly learned we’d waited too late, so we settled for tickets for the next night.We went upstairs to check on Cocoa and sneaked her out a side door to an alley for a potty break.When she was settled once more, I turned to Alice.“What now?” I asked.“Dinner.One thing about Vegas—you can eat cheap.”We ended up at a crowded buffet.Alice’s choice, not mine, but I didn’t bother arguing.When I was overweight, buffets were heaven.Everyone expects you to pile your plate full at a buffet, so I never felt self-conscious about the amount I ate.Just remembering those days was enough to help me keep my portions small now.Alice didn’t take much advantage of the bounty, either.No wonder she was so skinny.I hadn’t seen her eat a complete meal yet.We found a table next to a family with two children—a boy and a girl I guessed were around eight and six.The whole family was dressed in shorts and T-shirts, with wheat-blond hair and blue eyes.They could have stepped right out of a brochure that advertised Vegas as the perfect family vacation destination [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]