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.“Go, Alais.I have had enough of childish games.Go back to Eleanor.”I crossed the room to him and caught the door before he could close it in my face.“No, my lord.I will not leave you.”His body squire stood at attention in the room beyond, his eyes wide, one of Henry’s boots still in his hand.The other had been blacked already and sat warming by the fire.The boy saw Henry and myself and his face turned gray as ditchwater.He bowed when Henry raised one hand, giving him leave to go.I did not look at him, as if he were not there.I kept my eyes fixed on the king.“Alais, what do you want from me? Would you have me take you, like some milkmaid, like some peasant in a field? You are a princess of France.”“Yes, my lord king, I am a princess of France.And I would take you.”Henry laughed, running one hand through his mane of red gold hair, so that it stood up in clumps along his temples and above his forehead.He laughed long and hard, but I did not back down or look away.He thought to humiliate me, to make me leave him in peace, but I would have what I came for.Henry saw me watching him.He, too, felt the fire between us that would not go out.He sighed then, and sat down on his bed, his head between his hands.“Alais, God knows you are beautiful.And I have wanted you since the moment I saw you, kneeling in the straw.But I will not take you.”He met my eyes, and I saw the truth of why he stopped, of why he held his hand, when any other man would have had me and been done with it.“It would ruin your life.”I crossed the room slowly, as if he were the deer and I, the hunter, as if I did not want to startle him or frighten him away.I knelt once more between his knees, and raised my face to his, so that he might see my eyes, so that he might hear me, and know that I was in earnest.“Henry,” I said.“I want the life I choose, not one that was chosen for me.I want you.”Even then he did not reach for me, but looked down at me as if searching for the truth behind my eyes.No doubt he saw that my motives were not pure.And it was true that love for him alone did not drive me.No doubt he saw my anger at Eleanor and at Richard.He saw the pain of their betrayal in my face, though I had spent a long night at prayer trying to banish such thoughts from my heart.He knew, as I did, that what I offered was a political alliance that might not last the month.Other tides could rise, and sweep him from me, and me from him.He knew all this, so his touch was gentle when he laid his hand on my cheek.“What of our treaty, Alais? Do you not think on France?”“I always think of France, my lord king.”I took his hand from my cheek and kissed his palm, as Richard once had done to me.Henry held his breath, and I felt his desire rising even as I knelt before him.But he was not won, not yet.He was a man in control of his desires.I would have to meet his reason on common ground.“Let us make a new treaty, Henry, between us.And if it fails, I swear to you that I will marry where you bid me, and follow your commands for the rest of my life.I am yours, now and forever, if you would have me.”I would like to say that Henry touched me out of thankful joy in my presence, that love conquered reason, and he swept me into his arms.This was not the case, for either of us.Even as I knelt before him, I saw his mind turning over the problem I presented him.Before he so much as kissed me twice, he knew both the risks and the costs of what I offered him.But like me, he was willing to pay.He raised me up and drew me to him, so that I sat beside him on the bed of state.I wondered how many of his sons had been conceived in that bed, legitimate and otherwise.I wondered how many mistresses had lain between those sheets, as I was about to do, and whether Henry would keep me long, once he had me beneath him.But these thoughts, all thoughts of politics and loss, were burned away in the heat of Henry’s fire.His hands warmed me even as he stripped me first of my crown and veil, then of my red silk gown.Henry left my shift on me, for it seemed he liked the sight of my body outlined against it in the firelight.The fluid light on my young body held his focus for many minutes, and I thought perhaps he would only toy with me, and not take my maidenhead.I saw him wonder if I was a maiden at all, though he was too much a gentleman to say so.But as his hands raised my shift and toyed with my nether parts, a satisfied smile lit his face before his own gown was off.“I see you are mine in truth, and not just in name, Alais.”“I am, Henry I swear it.”He laughed, his lips against the skin of my breast.His tongue ran over me, even as his fingers entered me, and I gasped [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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.“Go, Alais.I have had enough of childish games.Go back to Eleanor.”I crossed the room to him and caught the door before he could close it in my face.“No, my lord.I will not leave you.”His body squire stood at attention in the room beyond, his eyes wide, one of Henry’s boots still in his hand.The other had been blacked already and sat warming by the fire.The boy saw Henry and myself and his face turned gray as ditchwater.He bowed when Henry raised one hand, giving him leave to go.I did not look at him, as if he were not there.I kept my eyes fixed on the king.“Alais, what do you want from me? Would you have me take you, like some milkmaid, like some peasant in a field? You are a princess of France.”“Yes, my lord king, I am a princess of France.And I would take you.”Henry laughed, running one hand through his mane of red gold hair, so that it stood up in clumps along his temples and above his forehead.He laughed long and hard, but I did not back down or look away.He thought to humiliate me, to make me leave him in peace, but I would have what I came for.Henry saw me watching him.He, too, felt the fire between us that would not go out.He sighed then, and sat down on his bed, his head between his hands.“Alais, God knows you are beautiful.And I have wanted you since the moment I saw you, kneeling in the straw.But I will not take you.”He met my eyes, and I saw the truth of why he stopped, of why he held his hand, when any other man would have had me and been done with it.“It would ruin your life.”I crossed the room slowly, as if he were the deer and I, the hunter, as if I did not want to startle him or frighten him away.I knelt once more between his knees, and raised my face to his, so that he might see my eyes, so that he might hear me, and know that I was in earnest.“Henry,” I said.“I want the life I choose, not one that was chosen for me.I want you.”Even then he did not reach for me, but looked down at me as if searching for the truth behind my eyes.No doubt he saw that my motives were not pure.And it was true that love for him alone did not drive me.No doubt he saw my anger at Eleanor and at Richard.He saw the pain of their betrayal in my face, though I had spent a long night at prayer trying to banish such thoughts from my heart.He knew, as I did, that what I offered was a political alliance that might not last the month.Other tides could rise, and sweep him from me, and me from him.He knew all this, so his touch was gentle when he laid his hand on my cheek.“What of our treaty, Alais? Do you not think on France?”“I always think of France, my lord king.”I took his hand from my cheek and kissed his palm, as Richard once had done to me.Henry held his breath, and I felt his desire rising even as I knelt before him.But he was not won, not yet.He was a man in control of his desires.I would have to meet his reason on common ground.“Let us make a new treaty, Henry, between us.And if it fails, I swear to you that I will marry where you bid me, and follow your commands for the rest of my life.I am yours, now and forever, if you would have me.”I would like to say that Henry touched me out of thankful joy in my presence, that love conquered reason, and he swept me into his arms.This was not the case, for either of us.Even as I knelt before him, I saw his mind turning over the problem I presented him.Before he so much as kissed me twice, he knew both the risks and the costs of what I offered him.But like me, he was willing to pay.He raised me up and drew me to him, so that I sat beside him on the bed of state.I wondered how many of his sons had been conceived in that bed, legitimate and otherwise.I wondered how many mistresses had lain between those sheets, as I was about to do, and whether Henry would keep me long, once he had me beneath him.But these thoughts, all thoughts of politics and loss, were burned away in the heat of Henry’s fire.His hands warmed me even as he stripped me first of my crown and veil, then of my red silk gown.Henry left my shift on me, for it seemed he liked the sight of my body outlined against it in the firelight.The fluid light on my young body held his focus for many minutes, and I thought perhaps he would only toy with me, and not take my maidenhead.I saw him wonder if I was a maiden at all, though he was too much a gentleman to say so.But as his hands raised my shift and toyed with my nether parts, a satisfied smile lit his face before his own gown was off.“I see you are mine in truth, and not just in name, Alais.”“I am, Henry I swear it.”He laughed, his lips against the skin of my breast.His tongue ran over me, even as his fingers entered me, and I gasped [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]